Here are the Top 10 things overheard at the NHL GM Meetings held today in Boca Raton, Florida:
#10: “No Mr. Fehr, just because every arena has boards, glass, and stanchions doesn’t make it an issue of owner collusion. Good try though.”
#9: “We hope everyone enjoyed their American Airlines flight to Florida, their Dunkin’ Donuts coffee and breakfasts, the coldest Budweiser beers at the pool, and ground transportation in the finest of Toyota cars.”
#8: “Burkie, quit bear-hugging everyone. We know what you’re proposing and we get it.”
#7: “Jacques Martin and I have finished reviewing our needs and are done evaluating the trade options available. Is anyone interested in trading a defencemen or centreman over 6-feet tall for our playoff run?”
#6: “We’d like to have 2 volunteers step forward and help us demonstrate a stanchion-shot head injury. Chiarelli, Gauthier- can you guys help us out?”
#5: “Given recent decisions and communications from members of the NHL Head Office, we are calling for an immediate symptom check, and mandatory concussion protocol for all its members.”
#4: “Hey Fehr! There’s a reason Crosby and all these concussed hockey players don’t heal as quickly as Bonds, McGwire and Sosa did when you made them rich.”
#3: “Sorry McGuire, that’s not your seat. Nope, that one isn’t either. Yes, all 30 are reserved for other people. Maybe next year, Pierre.”
#2: “We’d like to extend a warm welcome to all GMs who just arrived. Please find your name badges and meeting kits on the table, and then proceed to the back room where Mr. Gillies will give you your complimentary headshot.”
#1: “Yeehaw! Crosby’s skating again! Screw the proposals… last guy into the pool has to swim with Bettman and answer questions at the press conference!”
2forslashing 